"Perfection?"

There was a great conflict going on inside of me:
I was trying too hard. Trying so hard to be "perfect" for everyone else, and for Him. Therefore my existence was empty and mechanical. How did this happen? I was doing the "right" things on the outside, but I was screaming on the inside. I lived in a little "perfect" box where there was hardly enough room to turn around. I alienated people. I set myself apart from others, even the closest people. Instead of spending time with them, I would spend the time alone trying to make sure that I was doing what was "right" in the eyes of others and trying to perfect everything I did so that I wouldn't disappoint anyone. My life lacked balance. It was be perfect, don't say that, don't do this, watch your step, don't wear that, don't listen to that all the time. All of this was a culmination of teachings I picked up throughout my childhood, watching as my mom would try to be "perfect" for my dad, and how my peepaw would try to make my mimi look "perfect" when she was a drunken alcoholic before AA. In my attempt to be like everyone wanted me to be, I actually got further from them and my relationship with Him was quickly fading. Jesus was always available to the people, they could always touch Him and in Hebrews 4:15-16 it says He is not so far off that He cannot feel our pain. So what was I thinking? I remember telling the Lord that living to please Him and others was too hard. He kindly told me, that I made it that way and He was right, it was my fault.
Then the light came on.
In Matthew 11:28-30 Jesus said, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
I realized I don't have to do anything but love God and live, He will take care of the rest. My relationship with Him is designed to be custom for who I am and where I am, not who other people want me to be and where others want me to be; meaning He loves me and will always meet me where I am. This means I don't have to try, I only have to "BE". He will perfect me, and since He is at work in me there can be peace where conflict used to be.
I don't have to be so hard on myself and I'm so glad that God is merciful and quick to forgive.
If I stumble, I can confess, repent and keep going. I think this is the greatest lesson I have ever learned. Now that the burden of a boxed life has been lifted, I can fly