The sharp knife of a short life..

This week has been one word: hell. Every morning that I wake up I think it's all a dream, I turn my TV on and I see it on the news. Or I have a text/wall post telling me that everyone is here for me and praying for me. But I never wake up to a text from them, not a text saying it's all some cruel joke.. or that I've finally been waken up from this nightmare.. Usually when you lose one person in your life it's really hard, but when you lost 6 people all at once.. it doesn't hit as hard until a few days later. When you get calls/texts/messages/wall posts to you from people you haven't talked to since middle school telling you that they're here for you forever and they remember how me and one of the girls who is now dead were best friends... It just hurts so much more when there are six people you love are gone, especially when one of them has been your best friend for 4+ years..

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Calvin Reineck- you were my best friend/partner in crime/ride or die.. we grew apart over the years, but you always knew just how to put a smile on my face. I was your first kiss, and you told me you'd love me forever for teaching you how to "love someone the right way".. RIP

Nick Evans- you were absolutely crazy, and that's why we got along. You could say one word in an australian accent and it sounded legit, you always called me when you wanted to go get a snow cone or when you wanted a slushy, you always texted me and told me how I was your girly best friend.. RIP

TIMMY- you told me every time I wrote your name down it had to be in all caps, so there it is. I only met you 5-8 times, but every time I was around you, you'd go out of your way to let me know I was beautiful.. I never got to thank you for that.. RIP

Vivian Rodriguez- you girl, you were crazy.. people judged you for liking who you liked, and you stuck your middle finger up and did whatever you wanted. I loved that about you. You'd call me when you needed someone to cry to when you and Celeste were having problems, and then you'd hang up on me when she called you back ;) we always talked about getting matching tattoos of kittens and whatnot, but i'll never forget our last conversation about you wanting to start coming to church with me.. I wish you could have stayed around so that could have happened. RIP baby girl.



Savannah Lynn Morrero- now we're getting to the hard ones.. You were my little. In middle school I remember how you begged and begged to come to my birthday party and I said no every time until the day of, and then you couldn't even come haha. You always called me to make sure I was in school back when I used to skip, you texted me on weekends and told me to be safe. In middle school when you weren't following me and meg around, you would tell me how much you looked up to us. You will ALWAYS be my little. RIP

Alexis Jade Schooley- you have been my best friend for years.. I remember when we got in that fight in middle school and people were surrounding us, yelling out the colors of our purses. All because I didn't want you at my birthday party and I pushed Kayla into you.. Oh, and right after we were done fighting I complimented your shoes and you tried to get out of getting suspended by sayin my birthday party was that friday and I would get in trouble. I remember when we walked to Leonard allll the way from my house in chapel creek. When we found some kid's backpack and thought we had just solved a crime, and we made Todd call the cops everything. I remember when we would be running the mile in PE and we'd run off course to get snow cones. I remember when we would always go to Mansfield with Kayla and walk around that town like we owned it. I remember all those times when we would go up to Leonard and climb on the football posts.. I remember the night of the haunted house, right before we went in you smacked my butt and said "i love you boo boo"... I remember all those times when we would walk to Kaltrina's house and bug the hell out of her mom to make us their albanian food. I honestly don't have a clue what I'm going to do without you here. We texted everyday, almost all day long. You have been one of the biggest parts of my life for years now, and I could never imagine my life without you here with me. You ARE my best friend, and I love you so much, forever. RIP, best friend <3