Ramblings

Have you ever heard the word of God and walked in it for about a week, only to face and fail a test a few weeks later? Then suddenly you realize the word you heard was meant to be rolled over like cellphone minutes. Why is that? I think... it's because God is still preaching a personal sermon on that word just for you and that situation bumped you off course because you weren't ready.

Update: The wilderness is tough. My experience reminds me of sinking sand. It seems like every move I make even the strategic ones, brings me lower and lower into the earth. It's frustrating and painful, but I've decided to stop struggling, I'm going to lie still and let God do what He wants to do. If I perish, I perish. (spiritually that is).
2 Corinth 5:17 Furthermore, the wilderness is designed to rid us of ourselves, so we can become more like Him.


I've learned that, while I love the Lord very much, I am still holding onto reinforcements. Meaning, I sometimes rely on things and people during certain situations (like a backup plan). But I'm learning that God wants to be my point man. He wants me to come to Him FIRST with EVERYTHING. So every time I look elsewhere for help, I can hear Him say, "Talk to me." "Stop worrying about that, trust me." "I'm here, I care." But, I still get weary. I get weary because His response is not always what I want to hear and sometimes His provision doesn't come when I want it or how I preferred.

But thank God for the Holy Spirit because He reminds me that my life is not my own, I'm not saved for myself and that I shouldn't think too highly of myself and when I really drift, He'll ask, "Who do you think you are?" He'll remind me that I'm meant to carry out the life of Christ and to rejoice in my suffering and responsibility because they are high places. Right?

I read 2 Corinth 6: 1-13.. In my Bible this section is called, " A Suffering Ministry." It really encouraged me. I truly believe that God has called me to do something great and none of this is in vain. It's just another part of the process. I might not be comfortable and I might cry a salty ocean from time to time, but I know my current position is in His plan and at the end of the day that's all that really matters.

I'm in the wilderness building faith that won't tapout, because Jesus didn't.
The Wilderness is Temporary: The God that dwells within me is Eternal. I will outlast, everything/one trying to conquer me.